Smoking in Class
Hey Abacus, what’s science?
Science explains the natural world around us, Toast.
Could it explain girls?
It could certainly explain a few things, but probably not everything you’d want to know.
That must mean Carl is a girl scientist.
Why do you think he’s a girl scientist, Toast?
Because Carl teaches that fancy class about meeting girls!
Well, I don’t think he’ll be awarded an honourary degree anytime soon.
Scenes from Pickup Artist 101…
Hey Class! What’s shaking? Got questions about women? Shout ‘em out!
How do you compliment a woman?
Nice gams. Choice cheeks. Stellar bush. Next question!
What’s the best sex position?
All of them. Your wiener is doing something, somewhere, somehow. Nice. Next!
Should you tell a girl about your fantasies?
Hell no! You think it would go over well if I told a chick I wanna do Diana Ross and the Supremes at the same time?
What should you talk about on a first date?
If it’s going well, you shouldn’t be talking at all.
What if a lady is shy?
Ask for a rub ‘n tug, squeeze ‘n please, touch ‘n clutch, compress ‘n de-stress, stroke ‘n choke or skin ‘n sin.
What if you have… flatulence on a date?
If you’ve got a case of instrument ass, smoke a cigarette. Why do you think I smoking right now?
But what about the sound of flatulence?
You’re asking me how to whisper a dirty secret? Seriously? NEXT!