Bite Into ‘Em

Angry Chef, I brought a present for you, I mean… for all of us.

Hot damn! Cigars! What are you waiting for? BITE INTO ‘EM!

Oh shit we’ve gots to stop and get some cheap ass brandy if we’re smoking these cigars.

Hack!

Oh shit we’ve gots to stop and get doughnuts if we’re smoking cigars and drinking five-dollar brandy.

Hiccup!

Oh yeah! Dirty ol’ Tim Hortons!

Anastasia, zee sprinkled for you… Old fashioned glazed for Angry Chef… Carl gets a whole box of jelly ones for ‘imself…

You eating a doughnut, Mallory?

Oh yes.. zee chocolate double chocolate dipped chocolate chocolate.

Is good doughnut.

Soon…

ZZZZZZZzzzzzZZZZzz

You gonna fall asleep, Mallory?

Oh no, I don’t need to sleep. If I keep smoking cigars I can be awake for zee whole week, no problem.

And if Anastasia and Carl are asleep, we can keep smoking and driving and smoking and driving and smoking all night.

In zee nice and quiet.

The next day…

No way! I’m leaving this moon out here until someone sees it!

But it’s been an hour and we’re in the middle of nowhere!

SHUT UP! SHUT UP! HAVE A LIT CIGAR CARL!

AUGGHHHHHHHHHH!

THE CIGAR YOU THREW AT ME BLEW INTO MY CRACK! MY ASS IS ON FIRE!

JELLY DOUGHNUTS pTO THE RESCUE!

Oh thank god! It’s out! Man, I have to moon with this now! I’m all jellied up!

Betcha a wood panel station wagon passes us and a family talks for years about the purple cheeker they saw one warm afternoon on the prairies.