Anastasia and Carl

Whoa Anastasia, check out that huge ass over there!

Why are you so obsessed with big bums, Carl?

I can’t help it! You know those Garfield plush toys you see on station wagon windows?

Yeah! Little Garfield is holding on for dear life!

That’s what I want to do to that ass.

How come you can’t be a gentleman, Carl?

Whaddya talking about, Anastasia? I just brought you your favourite drink!

Peach schnapps and orange juice with unstirred grenadine. Oh dear.

You even got me two umbrellas so I can leave one in my drink and put one in my hair…

…because partying chose me.

I apologize Carl. But sometimes you are very rude!

I ain’t rude! I’m totally classy!

I even started teaching a class about being classy to help lonely guys learn how to meet ladies!

That’s awful sweet of you!

Scenes from Pickup Artist 101

Welcome to Pickup Artist 101. I don’t have a lesson plan, so just shout out your questions!

WHAT DO WOMAN WANT?

Easy, your junk! Next!

WHO’S EASIER, BLONDS OR BRUNETTES?

That’s a trick question. The easiest girls are brunettes dyed blond. Next!

WHAT HAPPENS IF YOU FALL IN LOVE AND GET MARRIED?

Buy a minivan and admit defeat!

Lamaze class is next door!